This photo is that of myself and my daughter though you can barely see her in the photo. As those who know me will attest to, I’m an extremely private person and this is in fact only the second post I can remember ever writing. I’m writing this post as I’m proud of my daughter and because a number of people including my clients have asked me to write it. They felt it was important to share this story with others.
For my daughter, just like the many young adults with ADHD I coach, the struggle is real, and the struggle is every day.
Despite being diagnosed with ADHD and dyslexia, my daughter achieved something truly remarkable, she was awarded a First-Class Honours degree! Her determination and brilliance continue to inspire me every day. I’m not proud of her because of the grade she was awarded, my admiration and respect for her stems from her determination and true grit in attaining her degree. I would have been proud of her no matter what classification she was awarded, but she wanted a first-class, and she got it.
I’ve watched her quiet determination as she mastered every ADHD tool at her disposal, employed every ADHD strategy she could, managed her dyslexia and worked hard to attain her goal. But the most important ingredient to her success is the love and support she received from family, friends, and her university professors.
From her family she received the love, understanding and space she needed to thrive:
Her room wasn’t always going to be tidy, neither was she quick to do her house chores, she could always do with a hug, we listened and did not judge, we motivated her.
From her friends she received the everyday support and understanding she craved to function as a young adult :
She wasn’t always going to turn up for social events on time, she could get socially overloaded and need some down time, she might forget your face if she only met you once (this wasn’t intentional, it wasn’t rudeness), her friends were on hand to body double with her whenever she needed it, they were never critical, they loved her and they showed it.
From her university professors she received the guidance and support that was essential for her success:
She wasn’t always going to turn up for lectures on time, she may miss some lectures if she was too tired to attend, she was trusted to watch videos in her own time to catchup on university work, they communicated with her effectively and regularly, they checked in on her, they actually cared.
Although I’ve always told her that having an ADHD diagnosis should not limit her or anyone in achieving their full potential, I’ve always suspected that my daughter wanted a first-class degree to prove to herself and others that someone with an ADHD and Dyslexia diagnosis could succeed in a world that often misunderstands neurodiversity.
I wrote this post to let people know that indeed, as we all know, the love, support and understanding you show anyone, but especially someone with an ADHD diagnosis can help shape their success and propel them to achieve their goals.
ADHD Insights:
- Time keeping: Individuals with ADHD often struggle with managing time, leading to frequent lateness, missed deadlines, or difficulty estimating how long tasks will take. This challenge is linked to difficulties with executive function, which affects planning and organisation.
- Sleeping & Tiredness: Many people with ADHD experience sleep difficulties, such as trouble falling asleep, restless nights, or feeling excessively tired during the day. These issues can be caused by a racing mind, difficulty winding down, or problems with sleep regulation.
- Body Doubling: Body doubling refers to the strategy of working alongside another person to improve focus and productivity. For those with ADHD, having someone present even if they’re not actively involved can make it easier to start and complete tasks.
- Communication: ADHD can impact communication skills, making it harder to follow conversations, stay on topic, or remember details. This may lead to misunderstandings or difficulties in expressing thoughts clearly.
- Hypersensitivity Dysphoria: Often called Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, this is an intense emotional response to perceived criticism or rejection. People with ADHD may feel overwhelming sadness, embarrassment, or anger in these situations, even if the feedback is minor or unintentional.
- Overloaded–Overwhelmed: Individuals with ADHD can become easily overwhelmed when faced with too much information, too many tasks, or noisy environments. This can lead to stress, anxiety, and difficulty functioning effectively in daily life.
If you’re interested in learning more about my approach and how I support and coach my daughter along with other young adults in achieving their goals, I’d be happy to connect, please get in touch
Tel : 07432 409 337
Contact : Funmi.oni@ataraxiacoaching.com
Website : https://www.AtaraxiaCoaching.com
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/p/DGOAXDSIoIh/?igsh=emx1ZTBkcTVvb3Y=
Client feedback :
“Funmi has truly been a life-changing coach. When I first began my sessions, I was overwhelmed with a heavy university workload and unsure how I would finish my degree on time. Funmi coached me using practical strategies that made completing my degree feel achievable, while also helping me build my self-confidence along the way. She has gone above and beyond in supporting me. I have always felt heard, understood, and encouraged in every session. Thanks to her coaching, I now feel more confident and capable in both my studies and life. I couldn’t recommend Funmi highly enough to anyone looking for a supportive, empowering, and results-driven life coach.”
Mojo, successful recent graduate
We came across Funmi’s life coaching services online earlier this year. After looking through a few other options, her write-up about herself and her approach really resonated with us. She seemed to be just what we needed and now I can confidently say she was exactly that! At the time, there were serious challenges with studies due to health reasons, tight deadlines, and additional difficulties. It felt like an overwhelming mountain to climb, and giving up seemed like the only option. During the first few coaching sessions, Funmi worked closely and patiently with them, breaking things down into manageable steps and developing strategies to move forward. She also guided us on how to communicate with the university, which led to much-needed flexibility around deadlines. Most importantly, Funmi helped restore self-belief and confidence. After every session, we could see the shift in mindset from hopelessness to “I can do this.”
This wasn’t just a job for her. Funmi’s dedication, encouragement, and genuine care came through at every stage. I’m thrilled to say that this support paid off: not only was the degree completed, but it was finished with results beyond what we thought possible. We are so grateful to Funmi for her guidance and encouragement. Thank you for pouring your heart into this work it has made all the difference!”
WF, Ecstatic Mother